Boyfriend joke-Trust

Nuria said to her boyfriend who was going on a road trip with his friends "I trust you Alex. Just remember one thing, my trust and your bones with break together."

Santa's aspiration

God appears in front of Santa Singh of India and says, "Tell me son. What do you aspire for?"

Santa Singh says, "All I want is a job, a room full of cash, and respite from this heat."

"So be it!", says God.

Santa Singh is not employed as a security guard of a Bank's ATM.


Source: www.reallyshortfunnyjokes.net

Blowing money

Sally says to her husband Jack, "Listen you need to stop drinking. You are spending all our money on alcohol."

Jack replies, "And what about you blowing a 100 dollars in the beauty salon? Isn't that wasting money?"

Sally says, "C'mon Jack, you know why I go there - so I look beautiful to you."

Jack replies, "And what do you think I drink alcohol for?"

Source: www.reallyshortfunnyjokes.net

Just like Mom

It was Juan's 35th birthday and he was celebrating with friends. One of his friends, Pepe asked him, "You should get married now. Haven't you found a woman?"

Juan replied, "Well, over the years,  I have brought many girlfriends home to meet my mom but she didn't like anyone."

Pepe said "That's an age old problem, but I know the solution. Get a girl who is just like your Mom."

Juan meets Pepe again after a couple of weeks and Pepe asks him, "Well how is it going? Did you find a girl your Mom would like?"

Juan replied without enthusiasm, "Ya I did. She is just like Mom. And Mom was all praises for her."

Pepe asked, "Then what's the trouble dude? Why the long face?"

Juan replied, "Dad doesn't like her."

Source: www.reallyshortfunnyjokes.net

Distant brother

Laurel: Who is this boy?
Hardy: He is my distant brother.
Laurel: What do you mean by that??!
Hardy: Well, there are seven other brothers between us.

Source: www.reallyshortfunnyjokes.net

Polo Jersey

Sana, with a killer expression, says to her husband Sandy, "How did you get these lipstick marks on your Polo jersey?"

Sandy replies back, "Fails me dear. I wasn't even wearing the jersey at that time."

Source: www.reallyshortfunnyjokes.net

Fortune teller

The fortune teller tells young John, "Son, I can see that there is a lot of studying in your future."

John says, "Listen Mr. Fortune teller, I am already studying a lot since the past 3 years. What I really need to know is when will I pass my exams!"

Source: www.reallyshortfunnyjokes.net

Disoriented men

When Alex was appointed the new in-charge of the mental hospital, he asked his subordinate to take him around the hospital premises for orientation.

In one of the corridors, Alex saw a man in torn clothes running towards him shouting, "Julia, Julia!!"

Alex asked the subordinate, "What is wrong with him?"

The subordinate replied, "This guy was in love with a girl called Julia but could not marry her. He was so disheartened that he lost his mind. He has been like this ever since."

When they were in another part of the hospital, Alex saw another disoriented man running haywire and screaming, "Julia! Julia!"

Alex looked at his subordinate questioningly and the subordinate quickly replied, "Well, he is the man who married Julia."

Source: www.reallyshortfunnyjokes.net

Wife in Beauty parlour

Dean was seated at the reception of a beauty parlour for nearly 4 hours, waiting for his wife who had promised him that she would take only an hour to finish her beauty treatment.

Frustration was creeping in, when Dean felt a hand on his shoulder. It was a stunning woman who said to him, "Let's go, honey."

Dean looked around frantically and said to her in a whisper,  "Listen lady, my wife is in there and she might come here anytime. Maybe some other time."

The woman shouted at him, "You scoundrel!! I AM YOUR WIFE!!"

Source: www.reallyshortfunnyjokes.net

Santa Banta joke - Demise

Santa : Sorry to learn about your father's demise. May his soul rest in peace. I am sure he has left you a lot.

Banta : Yes, he has.

Santa: Like what?

Banta: A lot of debt.

Source: www.reallyshortfunnyjokes.net

The disappearing customer

Alex went to the salon and asked the owner, "Hey Max, how long would I have to wait for a haircut?"

Max looked at the customers waiting and replied, "About an hour". On hearing this, Alex left.

He returned next week and asked Max, "Hey, how long is the waiting time for a haircut?"

Max looked at the customers already waiting, and replied, "About an hour." Alex left.

The week after that, Alex came again and asked the same question, "Hey Max, how long would I have to wait for a haircut?"

Max replied, "An hour or so." Alex left quietly.

Max was intrigued and asked a friend in the shop, "Paul, do me a favour. Please follow that guy and see where he goes."

Paul returned in a while and could not stop laughing. Max asked, "Well this has to be funny. So where did he go??"

Paul replied, "Your home!!"

Source: www.reallyshortfunnyjokes.net

Brand new suit

David saw his colleague Alfred walk into the office in a brand new suit. David exclaimed, "Not bad, dude! Where did you get the suit?"

Alfred smiled and replied, "Well, my wife got them for me. Pretty cool, isn't it?"

David replied, "Sure it is. Was it your anniversary?"

Alfred said, "No. beats me. The other day, I arrived home early from work, and there I found them on a chair near the bed."

Source: www.reallyshortfunnyjokes.net

Inconsolable

Linda was taking a walk when she noticed a small kid crying at the corner of the street. She bent and asked the little boy why he was crying. 

The boy, sobbing loudly, replied, "My uncle threw our three little puppies in the drain."

Linda, horrified by what she had just heard, reacted angrily, "Your uncle is evil. How could he do such a thing?"

The boy said, "That's true. He had promised that he would let me do it."

Source: www.reallyshortfunnyjokes.net

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