Clean jokes-Before it gets cold

A boy takes his girlfriend on a date. They went to a coffee shop and they ordered coffee.

The boy told to his girlfriend, “Drink quickly before it gets cold.”

Girlfriend asked with surprise, “Why?”

The boy replied, “Don’t u see, Hot coffee is for $5 and cold coffee for $10 !”

Yo mama jokes-Drawers

Yo mama's so nasty, she only changes her drawers once every 10000 miles.

Short funny jokes-Social security benefits

After showing my husband what his Social Security benefits would be after I kicked the can, he said, "That's not even enough to get my new wife's hair done each month!"

Doctor jokes-Bad breath

"My dentist has bad breath……Why every time he smokes he blows onion rings."

Funny Period Jokes - Importance of periods

Teacher : Do you know the importance of periods ?

Student : Yes once my sister she has missed two , my mom fainted , father got heart attack and our driver run away .

Short funny jokes-Chicken skeleton

Q. Why didn't the chicken skeleton cross the road ?
A. Because he didn't have enough guts.

Short funny riddles

What's hard and pink when it goes in, and wet and sticky when it comes out?
.
.
.
Bubble gum !

Student Joke of the day - Girl

Teacher: What should be in a book to make it a bestseller?

Student : A girl on the cover and no cover on the girl.

Short funny jokes-Time to pray

A pastor asked a little boy if he said his prayers every night..
"Yes sir," the boy replied.
"And, do you always say them in the morning, too?" the pastor asked.
"No sir," the boy replied. "I ain't scared in the daytime."

Short one liner jokes - Mans heart

Any woman that thinks the way to a mans heart is

through his stomach is aiming just a little too high.

Short funny jokes-Best costume

Why was the boy unhappy to win the prize for the best costume at the Halloween party ?
Because he just came to pick up his little sister !

Short Joke - Husband Wife

Phone rings,

Husband: If it is for me then say that I am not at home.

Wife answered: He is at home.

Shocked Husband: What the Hell?

Wife: It was for me !!

Short funny hillbilly jokes-Married

How can you tell if a hillbilly is married?
There are tobacco juice stains on both sides of his pickup truck.

Birthday party jokes-Clam

What does a clam do on his birthday?
He shellabrates!

Short funny jokes-Quietest place

What is the quietest place in the world?
The complaint department of the parachute company.

Really funny jokes-Dreadful fight

Three weeks after her wedding day, Joanna called her minister.
"Reverend," she wailed, "John and I had a DREADFUL fight!"
"Calm down, my child," said the minister, "It's not half as bad as you think. Every marriage has to have its first fight!"
"I know, I know!" said Joanna. "But what am I going to do with the BODY?"

Birthday jokes-Comb

Q. What did the bald man say when he got a comb for his birthday?
A. Thanks. I'll never part with it!

Really funny jokes-Off to college

The wife was crying as her daughter went off to college. Her husband consoled her,
"Don't think of it as losing a daughter. Think of it as gaining both a telephone and a bathroom."

Short funny jokes-Moosehead

What's the difference between Virginia and West Virginia?
In Virginia, Moosehead is a beer. In West Virginia it's a misdemeanor.

Short funny jokes-Positive

Two hydrogen atoms meet.
One says "I've lost my electron."
The other says "Are you sure?"
The first replies "Yes, I'm positive."