Short funny jokes-Average age

Q. What was the average age of a cave man?
A. Stone Age!

Hillbilly jokes-Possum

How many hillbillies does it take eat a 'possum?
Two. One to eat, and one to watch for cars.

Light bulb jokes-New age gurus

Q: How many New Age gurus does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: None - Change must come from within.

Ultimate jokes-Compilation of Mexican words

Compilation of Mexican words

'Heater' - My little sister started to choke, perro my mom told me to heater in the back.

'Juicy' - Hey Vato, I will roll a joint and ju tell me if juicy the cops!

'Sodas' - My vieja looks good and sodas her sister.

'Cheese' - Maria likes me pero cheese too fat.

'Chile ' - When my wife and I were dating, she was fine, but since we got married chile herself go.

'Juarez ' - My vieja slapped me and I said, juarez your *uckin problem! Bish!

'Chicken' - My wife wanted me to go to the store, but chicken go herself.

'Harrassment' - Orale vato my old lady caught me n bed wit my sancha pero harrasment nothing to me!!!

'Water' - My vieja gets mad and I dont even know water problem is.

'Brief' - My homie farted gacho bad, and I could not brief.

'Mushroom' - Orale vato, when all my familia gets in the car, there is not mushroom.

'Frito' - After arguing with the pinche policia he told me i wuz frito go.

'Wafer' - I wanted to go to the movies with my friends, pero los mensos didn't wafer me.

'July' - You told me you were going to the store and July to me! Julyer!

'Liver and Cheese' - Some vato tried to sweet talk my ruca, I told him 'orale loco liver alone, cheese mines.'

Short funny jokes-Harley and Hoover

What is the difference between a Harley and a Hoover?
The position of the dirt bag.

Short funny jokes-Gasping for breath

Q: What does it mean when a man is in your bed gasping for breath and calling your name?
A: You did not hold the pillow down long enough.

Sardar jokes--Swallowed a key

Santa: I have swallowed a Key.
Doctor: When?
Santa: 3 months back!
Doctor: What were you doing till now?
Santa: I was using duplicate key, now I have lost it too.

Short funny jokes-Elephant's legs

Q) If an elephant's front legs were doing 60 miles per hour...what would the back legs be doing?

A) Hauling ass !!!!!

Short funny jokes-Witnesses

Why do Italians hate Jehovah's Witnesses?
Because Italians hate all witnesses.

Short funny jokes-Computer dating service

A woman went to a computer dating service and said she didn't care about looks, income or background. All she wanted was a man of upright character.
Then a man came in and told them the only thing he was seeking in a woman was intelligence.
The service matched them together at once because they had one thing in common -- they were both pathological liars.

Short funny jokes-Plaque

What does the dentist of the year get?
A little plaque

Short funny jokes-Bull fighters

Q: What do you call four bull fighters in quicksand?
A: Quatro sinko.

Short funny jokes-LAPD

LAPD OFFICER: "We arrested this man beating the living daylights out of some poor slob for no reason at all! What should we charge him with?"
DESK SERGEANT: "Impersonating an Officer."

Really funny jokes-Small talk

Service in the restaurant was extremely slow. The husband was starting to flip out, so his wife tried to distract him with small talk.
"You know," she said, "our friend Rachael should be having her baby anytime now."
"Really?" the husband snapped. "She wasn't even pregnant when we walked in here."

Short funny jokes-Stolen

When I was a kid I used to pray every night for a new bike. Then I realized that the Lord doesn't work that way, so I stole a bike and asked him to forgive me.

Engineer jokes-Broke

Normal people believe that if it ain't broke, don't fix it.
Engineers believe that if it ain't broke, it is perfect, then expand it and add more features until it breaks.

Short funny jokes-Novocain

Did you hear about the Buddhist who refused Novocain during a root canal?
His goal: transcend dental medication.

Short funny jokes-Third floor on fire

Interviewer: Just imagine you are in the third floor, it caught fire. How will you escape?
Man: It's very simple i will stop my imagination.

Short funny jokes-Steamroller

Did you hear about the farmer you ploughed his field with a steamroller ?
He wanted to grow mash potatoes!

Short funny jokes-Sense of humor

Q: What do you call cattle with a sense of humor?
A: Laughing stock.