Really funny jokes, adult jokes, good jokes, short funny jokes, teacher jokes, very funny jokes, kids jokes, funny pictures
Thursday, April 19, 2012
Short funny jokes-Front teeth
The joker had a bad fall and lost his front teeth. It was no laughing matter.
Labels:
Short funny jokes,
short humor jokes
Wednesday, April 18, 2012
Doctor jokes-Duck analysis
Three doctors are in the duck blind and a bird flies overhead. The general practitioner looks at it and says, "Looks like a duck, flies like a duck... it's probably a duck," shoots at it but misses and the bird flies away.
The next bird flies overhead, and the pathologist looks at it, then looks through the pages of a bird manual, and says, "Hmmmm...green wings, yellow bill, quacking sound...might be a duck." He raises his gun to shoot it, but the bird is long gone.
A third bird flies over. The surgeon raises his gun and shoots almost without looking, brings the bird down, and turns to the pathologist and says, "Go see if that was a duck."
The next bird flies overhead, and the pathologist looks at it, then looks through the pages of a bird manual, and says, "Hmmmm...green wings, yellow bill, quacking sound...might be a duck." He raises his gun to shoot it, but the bird is long gone.
A third bird flies over. The surgeon raises his gun and shoots almost without looking, brings the bird down, and turns to the pathologist and says, "Go see if that was a duck."
Labels:
animal jokes,
doctor jokes,
Really Funny Jokes
Funny jokes-How long?
A Swede man goes to a lumber yard to buy some lumbers of eight feet length in particular.
The salesman of the yard asked the Swede: “How long do you want them?”
The Swede: “For quite long, you see, I am building a house.”
The salesman of the yard asked the Swede: “How long do you want them?”
The Swede: “For quite long, you see, I am building a house.”
Labels:
Clean jokes,
Good jokes,
Really Funny Jokes
Tuesday, April 17, 2012
Really funny jokes-Anything for wife?
"And will there be anything else, sir?" the bellboy asked after setting out an elaborate dinner for two.
"No thank you," the gentleman replied. "That will be all."
As the young man turned to leave, he noticed a beautiful satin negligee on the bed. "Anything for your wife ?" he asked.
"Yeah! That's a good idea," the fellow said. "Please bring up a postcard."
"No thank you," the gentleman replied. "That will be all."
As the young man turned to leave, he noticed a beautiful satin negligee on the bed. "Anything for your wife ?" he asked.
"Yeah! That's a good idea," the fellow said. "Please bring up a postcard."
Labels:
Good jokes,
Hilarious jokes,
Really Funny Jokes
One line jokes-Hotel
A hotel is a place that keeps the manufacturers of 25-watt bulbs in business.
Labels:
One line jokes,
Short funny jokes,
short humor jokes
Funny jokes-Best friend fooling around
One day Dean came home from his office and the first thing he did was to shoot his dog. Martin, his neighbor and friend saw this and asked the reason.
Dean said: “An unknown person called my office and informed me that my best friend was fooling around with my wife.”
Martin was mighty relieved.
Labels:
animal jokes,
Good jokes,
Really Funny Jokes
Monday, April 16, 2012
Hilarious jokes-Lawyer's advice
A dog ran into a butcher shop and grabbed a roast off the counter. Fortunately, the butcher recognized the dog as belonging to a neighbor of his. The neighbor happened to be a lawyer.
Incensed at the theft, the butcher called up his neighbor and said, "Hey, if your dog stole a roast from my butcher shop, would you be liable for the cost of the meat?" The lawyer replied, "Of course, how much was the roast?" "$7.98."
A few days later the butcher received a check in the mail for $7.98. Attached to it was an invoice that read: Legal Consultation Service: $150 .
Incensed at the theft, the butcher called up his neighbor and said, "Hey, if your dog stole a roast from my butcher shop, would you be liable for the cost of the meat?" The lawyer replied, "Of course, how much was the roast?" "$7.98."
A few days later the butcher received a check in the mail for $7.98. Attached to it was an invoice that read: Legal Consultation Service: $150 .
Labels:
Clean jokes,
Hilarious jokes,
Really Funny Jokes
Sunday, April 15, 2012
Really funny jokes-Native language
Two anthropologists fly to the south sea islands to study the natives. They go to two adjacent islands and set to work. A few months later one of them takes a canoe over to the other island to see how his colleague is doing. When he gets there, he finds the other anthropologist standing among a group of natives.
"Greetings! How is it going?" says the visiting anthropologist.
"Wonderful!" says the other, "I have discovered an important fact about the local language! Watch!"
He points at a palm tree and says, "what is that?"
The natives, in unison, say "Umbalo-gong!"
He then points at a rock and says, "and that?"
The natives again intone "Umbalo-gong!"
"You see!", says the beaming anthropologist, "They use the SAME word for 'rock' and for 'palm tree'!"
"That is truly amazing!" says the astonished visiting anthropologist, "On the other island, the same word means 'index finger'!"
"Greetings! How is it going?" says the visiting anthropologist.
"Wonderful!" says the other, "I have discovered an important fact about the local language! Watch!"
He points at a palm tree and says, "what is that?"
The natives, in unison, say "Umbalo-gong!"
He then points at a rock and says, "and that?"
The natives again intone "Umbalo-gong!"
"You see!", says the beaming anthropologist, "They use the SAME word for 'rock' and for 'palm tree'!"
"That is truly amazing!" says the astonished visiting anthropologist, "On the other island, the same word means 'index finger'!"
Labels:
Good jokes,
Hilarious jokes,
Really Funny Jokes
Clean jokes-Caesar to Cleopatra
What did Caesar say to Cleopatra ?
Toga-ether we can rule the world !
Toga-ether we can rule the world !
Labels:
Clean jokes,
Short funny jokes,
short humor jokes
Saturday, April 14, 2012
Hilarious jokes-The linguist
The linguist's husband walked in and caught his wife sleeping with a young co-ed.
He said, "Why, Susan, I'm surprised."
She bolted upright, pointed her finger and corrected him, "No. I am surprised. You are astonished."
He said, "Why, Susan, I'm surprised."
She bolted upright, pointed her finger and corrected him, "No. I am surprised. You are astonished."
Labels:
Good jokes,
Hilarious jokes,
Really Funny Jokes
Friday, April 13, 2012
Animal jokes-Birthday
What do you give a nine-hundred-pound gorilla for her birthday?
I do not know, but you hope she enjoys it.
I do not know, but you hope she enjoys it.
Labels:
animal jokes,
Clean jokes,
Really Funny Jokes
Short funny jokes-Lion tracks
"Look, guide, here are some LION tracks."
"Good. You see where they go and I'll find out where they came from."
"Good. You see where they go and I'll find out where they came from."
Labels:
Good jokes,
Short funny jokes,
short humor jokes
Thursday, April 12, 2012
Really funny jokes-Great fathers
Those three boys are in the schoolyard bragging of how great their fathers are.
The first one says: "Well, my father runs the fastest. He can fire an arrow, and start to run, I tell you, he gets there before the arrow".
The second one says: "Ha! You think that's fast! My father is a hunter. He can shoot his gun and be there before the bullet".
The third one listens to the other two and shakes his head. He then says: "You two know nothing about fast. My father is a civil servant. He stops working at 4:30 and he is home by 3:45"!!
The first one says: "Well, my father runs the fastest. He can fire an arrow, and start to run, I tell you, he gets there before the arrow".
The second one says: "Ha! You think that's fast! My father is a hunter. He can shoot his gun and be there before the bullet".
The third one listens to the other two and shakes his head. He then says: "You two know nothing about fast. My father is a civil servant. He stops working at 4:30 and he is home by 3:45"!!
Labels:
Hilarious jokes,
Office jokes,
Really Funny Jokes
Wednesday, April 11, 2012
Policeman joke
A man was recently flying to New York. He decided to strike up a conversation with his seat mate. "I've got a great policeman joke. Would you like to hear it?"
"I should let you know first that I am a policeman."
"That's OK. I'll tell it really slow!"
"I should let you know first that I am a policeman."
"That's OK. I'll tell it really slow!"
Labels:
Clean jokes,
Hilarious jokes,
Really Funny Jokes
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)