Doctor jokes-Panic in the Operation room

Pablo asked his friend David, "I heard you escaped from the Operation room. What happened?

David replied, "You have no idea what I went through at the hospital. The nurse kept saying 'Don't be worried', 'Don't be tense', 'Don't panic', 'It will soon be over', 'It is only a small operation' and so on."

Pablo said, "She must be trying to pacify you. Why were you so scared?"

Davis replied, "I was scared....because she was speaking to the Doctor!!"

A dying miser

Santa Singh the miser was on his death bed. He reached out for his wife's hand and asked, "Where are you?"

Santa's wife Preeto took his hand and replied, "I am right here, my dear."

Then Santa Singh said, "Where are my children?"

His sons held his hand and said "We are right here Daddy."

Santa Singh paused for a moment and then said, "Then why is the fan running in the other room?"

Beer joke-Technique to sell twice

Andre staggers into the bar, completely sloshed. He asks the bar attendant for a beer and says to him, "I can share a technique with you which will help you sell twice the amount of beer."

The bar attendant asks, "Wow, what is it?"

Andre replies, "Nothing complicated. You simply have to pour full glasses."

Judge joke-Odd figure

The Judge charged Peter with rape and pronounced in the court, "You are to undergo ten years of rigorous imprisonment and you are charged with a fine of 10608 dollars."

Peter asked, "I did not understand the odd figure of 10608 dollars."

The Judge replied, "10000 dollars for rape, 4% for local taxes and 2% entertainment tax."

Sardar joke-How to enjoy a banana

Sardar Santa Singh was eating a banana without peeling it. His friend Surinder commented, "Why don't you peel it first?"

To this, Sardar Santa Singh replied, "Why the need to peel? I already know there is a banana inside."

All kinds

Tom says to his wife, "What kind of food have you cooked? This tastes like sh*t!"

Sandra mutters to herself, "Oh God, this man has tasted everything in life."

Funny joke-Finally at rest

Rebecca, who had 9 children from her marriage to Dan, decided to remarry when Dan died. So she married Bosco and had 8 more children.

When Bosco died, Rebecca decided to marry one more time and had 6 more children from her marriage to John.

One day, Rebecca passes away. At the funeral, Father Gomes prayed for her and said, "Thank you Almighty, for they are finally together."

One of the mourners asked another, "Does Father Gomes mean Dan, Bosco or John?"

The other mourner replies, "I think he is referring to her legs."