Short funny jokes-Dumb blonde

Why are all dumb blonde jokes one liners?
So men can understand them.

Clean jokes-Dead

Two hunters are out in the wild hunting, when out of nowhere, one of the hunters falls to the ground. The other hunter checks if he's breathing, but there's no sign of life, so he calls 911: "Please! Help me! I think my friend is dead!"
The operator says: "ok, ok, calm down, first, make sure if he's dead". After a short moment of silence, a gunshot is heard, then the frantic hunter says: "ok, now what?!"

Short funny jokes-Exclamatory

Teacher: Four beautiful girls are walking on the road.
Change it to exclamatory sentence.
Student: WOW !

Humor jokes-The first date

A guy walks into a bookstore. Not looking for anything in particular. On his way to the back of the store, he spots something of interest. A book, with a very interesting title, "Dating for the New Millennium. What Women Want." So he picks it up and opens it to a random page.
"Chapter 1 The First Date."
So, he glances the chapter over for a few minutes, and rushes out of the bookstore to call a friend whom he's wanted to ask out for quite a while.
When he gets home, picks up the phone and calls her. She answers, "Hello?"
He says, "Hi, Jessica? It's me. Listen, I was wondering if you would want to go see a movie with me tonight?"
She says, "Sure, I don't see anything wrong with that."
He gets excited. He thought she'd say, "No Way!" but she didn't. So, he decided to take it one step further.
He asks, "Great, well how about dinner before the movie?"
She replies, "Sure, that would be great too!"
"Fine, I'll pick you up about 9, you should have finished eating by then!"

Really funny jokes-The Picnic

A Jewish Rabbi and a Catholic Priest met at the town's annual 4th of July picnic. Old friends, they began their usual banter.
"This baked ham is really delicious," the priest teased the rabbi. "You really ought to try it. I know it's against your religion, but I can't understand why such a wonderful food should be forbidden! You don't know what you're missing. You just haven't lived until you've tried Mrs. Hall's prized Virginia Baked Ham. Tell me, Rabbi, when are you going to break down and try it?"
The rabbi looked at the priest with a big grin, and said, "At your wedding."

Funny farm jokes-Bug flew into a barn

A farmer was milking his cow. He was just starting to get a good rhythm going when a bug flew into the barn and started circling his head. Suddenly, the bug flew into the cow's ear. The farmer didn't think much about it, until the bug squirted out into his bucket. It went in one ear and out the udder.

Funny jokes-Freeing the lobsters

One evening Josie went to seafood restaurant for dinner. When she saw the tank where they kept the lobsters she asked a waiter, "Why are those creatures in that tank?"

"They are the lobsters we serve our customers!" answered the waiter.

"You mean you're going to kill them," said Josie.

"Absolutely, " said the waiter.

Josie was so upset that she immediately exited the restaurant, drove to a nearby convenience store, purchased hefty bags and returned to the restaurant to accomplish her covert mission. Taking pity on the poor creatures, she waited until the moment was right, and snatched all of the lobsters from the tank, threw them in the bag, and hightailed it out of the restaurant. Later she went to the woods to set the poor animals free!