Knock knock jokes-The interrupting cow

"Knock-knock."
"Who's there?"
"The interrupting cow."
"The interrupting cow wh-"
"MOOOO!"
"Very f-"
"MOOOO!"
"I get i-"
"MOOOO!"
"OK, that's get-"
"MOOOO!"
"Seriously, that's get-"
"MOOOO!"
"SHUT U-"
"MOOOO!"
"Go to-"
"MOOOO!"
"You're being a-"
"MOOOO!"

Animal jokes-Warm in winter

How do sheep keep warm in winter ?

Central bleating !

Hilarious jokes-Raising rabbits

The French will eat almost anything. A young cook, Jean Luc, decided that the French would enjoy feasting on rabbits and decided to raise rabbits in Paris and sell them to the finer restaurants in the city.

Jean Luc searched all over Paris seeking a suitable place to raise his rabbits. None could be found.

Finally, an old priest, Father Pierre, at the cathedral said he could have a small area behind the rectory for his rabbits. Jean Luc successfully raised a number of them, and when he went about Paris selling them.

One restaurant owner asked him where he got such fresh rabbits. Jean Luc replied with a smile, 'I raise them myself, near the cathedral. In fact, I have ... a hutch back of Notre Dame.'

Hilarious jokes-Horse race

George said to Fred, 'I put $20 on a horse last week and he came in at twenty five to one.',

'Wow! you must be loaded', said Fred.

'Not really' said George, 'the rest of the field came in at twelve thirty.'

Animal jokes-Inside

Tom : Why do mommy kangaroos hate rainy days?

Jerry : Because then the kids have to play inside.

Animal jokes-Drink in cafe

Three animals were having a drink in a cafe, when the owner asked for the money.
"I'm not paying," said the duck. "I've only got one bill and I'm not breaking it."
"I've spent my last buck," said the deer.
"Then the duck'll have to pay," said the skunk.
"Getting here cost me my last scent."

Animal jokes-Italian dinosaur family

Q: What is the head of an Italian dinosaur family called?

A: Ptera Don

Animal jokes-Blouse making business

Tom: What name did the lady dinosaur give to her company that made ladies t-shirts?

Jerry: Try Sara's Tops.

Animal jokes-Floor material

Tom: Do you know what is the floor of a dinosaur's home made of?

Jerry: Let me guess...Rep-Tiles

Animal jokes-Penguin in Bar

A Galapagos penguin walks into a bar, goes to the counter, and asks the barkeep, "Have you seen my brother?"

The barkeep asks, "I don't know, what does he look like?"

One line jokes-Lost voice

The below questions has always haunted me.....

If a swine loses its voice, is it disgruntled?

Really funny jokes-Loan to hog

An ambitious hog goes to a bank to ask for a loan. He steps up to the counter and asks for an application from the clerk, Patrice Vack.

"Hi, I would like to apply for a loan", said the hog.

Patrice Vack replied, "Do you have any collateral for this loan; something that can stand against your loan?"

The hog replied, "All I have is this statue of a unicorn."

"I am not sure," said Patrice Vack, "I'll need to check with the manager about this."

Patrice Vack goes to see the bank manager.

The bank manager, who addresses Patrice by her nickname Patty, says: "Knick Knack, Patty Vack. Give the hog a loan. His old man's a Rolling Stone" (Pun from the lyrics of THE OLD MAN song)

Short funny jokes-Hippo in bed

Q. What should you do if you find a hippopotamus in your bed?

A. Guess you'll have to sleep somewhere else.

Funny jokes-Flying kitten

Father Moore had a naughty little kitten named Batty who was always up to some mischief. Once, Batty climbed up a small tree in Father Moore's backyard and then refused to come down.

Father Moore tried hard to get the kitten down by calling out its name, also tried offering milk, sweets, but Batty would just not come down. As the tree was not strong enough to climb, Father Moore thought that if tied one end of a rope to the tree and the other to his car and drove ahead to bend the tree, he could perhaps reach up and get Batty. He did it and felt that he should go a little bit further so that the tree is adequately bent for him to reach Batty. But as he moved a little further ahead, the rope snapped.

The tree went "boing!" and Batty sailed through the air and out of sight. Father Moore felt terrible. He went searching for Batty in the entire neighborhood and its vicinity, asked people if they had seen Batty but his attempts in locating the little kitten failed.

Father Moore committed Batty to the Lord's keeping and went back to normal life.

A few days later, he met a lady at the local store buying food and he noticed she was carrying a tin of cat food. He distinctly remembered that this lady hated cats so he questioned her about the cat food.

She replied, "You will find it hard to believe but my little boy Tommy had been pestering me for a cat, and I kept declining his request. Then one day, he begged again and I told him if God gave him a cat, I would allow him to keep it. I saw Tommy go out in the yard, get on his knees, and pray to God for a cat. And then, something unbelievable happened!! A kitten came flying out of the sky, and landed right in his lap!!!"

Short funny jokes-Horse in bar

Harry, the horse trots into a pub.

The bartender asks, "So, why the long face?"

Animal jokes-Karate pig

Bitzer: What is the term for a pig that practices karate?

Shaun: A pork chop.

Animal jokes-Dog's favourite song

Q: What is a dog's loved song?

A: Ain't nuttin but a hound dog!!

(Pun for Elvis Presley's 1956 hit song)

Short funny jokes-Electric eggs

Laurel : What kind of bird lays electric eggs?

Hardy: A battery hen!

Short funny jokes-Fit more pigs

Laurel: How do I fit more pigs in my farm?

Hardy: Build a sty-scraper!

Court room humor

Hilarious courtroom exchange

Lawyer: Did he pick the pug up by the ears?
Witness: No.

Lawyer: What was he doing with the pug's ears?
Witness: Lifting them up in the air.

Lawyer: Where was the dog at this time?
Witness: Connected to the ears.