Short funny jokes-Tongue

A little boy while filling up a form: What should I write against mother tongue?
Father: Very long...!

Short funny jokes-Legal documents

What animals are on legal documents?
- Seals

Short funny jokes-Dentist

Q: Why did the king go to the dentist?
A: To get his teeth crowned!

Short funny jokes-Siamese twins

Why did the Siamese twins move to England?
A: So the other one could drive.

Short funny jokes-Who cares

Who cares about Russia? What did they ever give us, really? That stinkin' dressing? We had ketchup and mayonnaise the whole time, people.

Short funny jokes-Crazy

Q: How do crazy people go through the forest?
A: They take the psycho path

Short funny jokes-Policeman's help

"Once when I was lost.. I saw a policeman and asked him to help me find my parents. I said to him…Do you think we'll ever find them.?
He said..I don't know kid.. there are so many places they can hide."

Hilarious short jokes-Form filling

An actress was filling up a form.
There was a column in the form where one was required to state martial status.
Married/ Unmarried.
And she wrote: Occasionally Married.

Short funny jokes-New husband

What's the difference between a new husband and a new dog?
After a year, the dog is still excited to see you.

Short funny jokes-Bottom of the ocean

Q: What lies at the bottom of the ocean and twitches?
A: A nervous wreck.

Short funny jokes-Laundry

How do men sort their laundry?
"Filthy" and "Filthy but Wearable."

Short funny jokes-Hijackers' demands

A group of terrorists hijacked a plane full of politicians.
They called down to ground control with their list of demands and added that if their demands weren't met, they would release one politician every hour.

Short funny jokes-Ink

Why did the farmer call his pig "Ink?"
Because it was always running out of the pen.

Short funny jokes-Hearing loss

What's the most common cause of hearing loss amongst men?
Wife saying she wants to talk to him.

Short funny jokes-Worse

What's worse finding a worm in a apple?
A half eaten worm!

Hilarious short jokes-Birthday gift

Dad : Son, what do you want for your birthday?
Son : Not much dad, just a radio with a sports car around it.

Short jokes-Moos

Why are mooos afraid ?
Because they're all cow words.

Short funny jokes-For the first time

The little girl went to church for the first time. As she was leaving with her parents, the minister asked how she had liked church.
"I liked the music," she replied, "but the commercial was too long."

Short funny jokes-Toilet

Q: What did one toilet say to the other toilet?
A: You look a bit flushed!

Short funny jokes-Truly married

No man is truly married until he understands every word his wife isn't saying.